Wednesday, July 12, 2006

I'm back!

Lesley called me last night to ask me what was wrong, I hadn’t blogged in a couple weeks? I always wonder what’s going on when one of the blogs I read isn’t updated for a while, unfortunately, I can’t call any of mine to find out.

I’ve actually had some news to share, I just haven’t had the energy to write about it all. I was elected Treasurer of my PTK chapter, and we went to a leadership conference at Texas A&M in Commerce. That was so much fun – the best time I’ve had in a long time. We laughed, and played card games, and laughed some more. I can’t wait until the next trip.

I also got a scholarship for the 2006-2007 school year. It’s not a very big one, but it will pay for most of my tuition, so there’s one less thing I have to worry about!

We spent entirely too much money on the 4th of July, and I forgot my camera so didn’t take any pictures of our beautiful fireworks. We didn’t get to set them all off – turns out that during the week, the park has an 11:00 curfew instead of 12:00, so we didn’t get to set off any of the really good ones at all. We waited until the next Saturday and went out to a friends place (in the middle of BFE) and set them off for the kids – they loved it. Shaylee is almost 2 so we worried how she would react, but she ooohhhed and aaaahhhhed and wowed.

Things have been a little tense around the house lately. All of us have been fighting off some depression, none of us very successfully. It’s been pretty tough on Chris and I having to deal with and take care of Mom and Dad, especially as newlyweds. When Mom first got sick with her aneurysm right before the wedding, and we knew that we were going to have to take care of Mom and Dad, and that Mom was going to have to live with us for a little while, I told Chris that if he wanted to postpone, or even call off the wedding I would understand. Of course he didn’t, and I am so very glad that he didn’t. But neither of us really understood what we were getting into with Mom & Dad.

Chris and I talked the other night, and I told him that I feel like I’m drowning. Everyone needs something and it seems like I’m the only one who can provide any of it. When Mom moved here, I thought that things would get better, that she would be able to help me with Dad – go and visit, take him stuff, etc. Instead, she never wants to go see him, so I still have to do everything for him and she’s here with her wants and needs as well. Her not having a car isn’t helping the matter any, but what am I supposed to do? I refuse to let her drive while she’s on the Xanax and the doctor wants to wait until after her aneurysm surgery to get her off of it, so yet again we’re in limbo.

Chris has been a bit depressed himself. He was in between jobs when Mom had her wreck, and he’s been a godsend to be able to take her to all of her doctor’s appointments. But he doesn’t feel like he’s contributing to the household, and every time he goes to look for a job, something else pops up that I need him to handle for me.

I went to the doctor on Monday to discuss my potassium, and she said that the last blood work showed I’m diabetic, and all my bad stuff went higher and my good stuff went lower, and she’d be putting me on a bunch of medication except we’re going to try to get pregnant in 6 months. So I’m to diet and exercise and quit smoking…….

And then I’ve got that respiratory sickness we had last October again. It’s not as bad this time, but I can’t sleep at night for coughing, can’t breathe, and if my nose doesn’t open up soon, I’m going to cut the damn thing off! Where does all that snot come from?????

So right now I’m just getting thru each day, trying not to take it out on the people around me, and hoping that someday soon it’s going to get better. It’s got to, right?


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